Why is that I effectively reflect at the middle of the night? Anyway, it’s been months since the break up and I can confidently say that I’m not yet over him since few minutes ago I turn to Adele for comfort. If you ask me what exactly is the reason why we broke up I can’t give a definite answer cause there isn’t. In reality many factors contributed on the grounds why it happened. Yes, for a month I felt bitter and secretly stalked him. In reality the best way to get over someone is to pray to God for help. You can’t possibly do it alone. When the going gets tough, there’s no better person to turn to than Him. Along with my morning prayer is that He will give me strength to get through this day without thinking about him and acceptance that this is part of His plan. Everyday, I wouldn’t let it pass without this small prayer and it greatly helped me. With this I made a small but constant relationship with Him. But lately I forgot about Papa God but I’m willing to make this right this time.
So going back, with my friends around I can say, “di ko na naiisip yun” but I’m not only lying to my friends but as well as to myself. As a human I have a weak spot for everything. Earlier he passed by the shop and talked to my mom. Hearing about it made my heart skip, like a kid who curiously asked about him but still playing cool. After hearing how he’s been, memories came back and heartache came with it. I can’t help but cry while laying in my bed, the exact place where he broke up with me. You’ll pond over why did he end the relationship, was it my fault? The thing that made me cry is that I knew I could do better but I wasn’t given the chance to prove myself. I guess I realized it too late for the relationship to work.
I could go on and on about this but the lesson I’ve learned is that I didn’t regret anything. It may sound cliche but its true. Imagine if these didn’t happen how can I learn or perhaps how will it affect my personality.
Since its a new year, time for a makeover. :D